05.20.16 True Life : I Miss Paying Rent

05.20.16 True Life : I Miss Paying Rent

Privacy, the uncensored company of friends, walking around the house naked, drinking wine at 11 am, the option of being alone and hearing no one's voice (but your neighbors' or your annoying roommate) - having your own place has its perks.  Its pitfall? Paying the rent every, single month.  According to a recent study by the PEW Research Center, the percentage of 18 - 34 year olds living with their parents is higher today than it has been in decades.  They call us "Boomerang Kids."  Rent everywhere across the nation increases by an average of 10% annually, and usually eats at anywhere from 35% - 75% of the total income of adults in their 20's.

But to be honest, I miss paying rent.

It's been a year since I've moved back to my hometown.  I've been working odd jobs and pressing towards my next step.  I'm so blessed and grateful to have the support of my family but I miss having my own space.  Once I fulfilled my daily obligations, I could enter my home and listen to the sound of nothing but cars passing by.  There were no arguments, no preferences on the placement of objects, no questions about my whereabouts, and no deep discussions about BLAH BLAH BLAH!!!  I was free to come and go as I pleased.  It was beautiful and somehow it seems so distant from my reach.  I know that one day I will experience the joy of my own place again, but I need my parents' support until then.

So how do I survive being under the supervision of my parents at the age of 26 ?!

1) Check-In (Unfortunately)

Save yourself the headache and the painful conversation when you get home from work or from having a fun night out.  Send your parents a simple text, call them, or send an email and say, "Hey, I'm at [INSERT PLACE HERE]. I'll be home around [INSERT TIME HERE]."  This may not be something that your parents require, but mine? TUH! It can make you feel like you're 15 years old with a RAZR flip phone.  But you're ultimately saving yourself.  Swallow what pride you have left and then read #2.

2) Remember, This is Only Temporary!

Chant this to yourself DAILY!!! When your mom scolds you for leaving toothpaste on the sink, or when you come home knowing that someone will give you longwinded, unsolicited advice, repeat to yourself, "this is all temporary."  Know that you will not forever be in your parents' house - following their rules.  Right now you are.  So, it's important to respect their home and abide by their standards.  Just know that JOY COMETH IN THE MORNING!!! #PraiseBreak.

3) Go Out!

Find activities to do outside of the house.   Enjoy time with your friends at a bar, a park, or their apartments! Do what you enjoy outside of your parents' home so that you still have your sense of independence and freedom.  It's important to hold onto that and to not develop resentment.

4) Start a savings account 

It's important that while you're telling yourself that "this is only temporary!" you're also making sure that this living situation is ACTUALLY ONLY temporary.  Start a "moving out" savings account and set aside a percentage of your gross income.  You can save two months rent, money for furniture, or whatever else you might need when you make your final exit.  Whatever you do, don't touch this money and fight for your chance to walk around the house naked again!

5) Pay a Bill

One way to get your parents off your back with the "as long as you live in MY house!" speech, is to contribute to the expenses.  Offer to take on one of the amenities bills or to pay part of the mortgage.  Offer what you can, but show that as an "adult" you understand the financial sacrifices that they're making for you and that you appreciate them doing so.  (It's also an awesome platform to use when you're in an argument with them.)

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